It’s fun and flirty and the newest dating gimmick. Called “flirtexting,” it’s flirting via text messaging (see our previous post). Kind of like Twitter for daters, flirtexting is a way to be intimate without getting serious. Keeping in touch with each other by sharing little thoughts and observations as you both move through the day is a great way to get to know each other better. Best of all, because the connections are casual, brief, occasional and don’t require an immediate response, flirtexting exerts none of the pressure that can make daters feel crowded or pressured early in a relationship.
Flirtexting can be a lot of fun, but improperly used, it can scare off someone you’re interested in. So be careful and follow these tips to keep flirtexting fun and flirty:
- Keep it short. Like tweeting, messages should be brief; not more than a dozen words.
- Learn the lingo. Flirtexting uses the same cryptic acronyms and shorthand abbreviations as Twitter and text messaging (LOL, FYI, etc.). Only use the most common; if you use something too obscure or make something up, your date won’t know what you’re talking about. Brush up on text lingo at Webopedia or Netlingo.
- Keep it fun. This is a great place to give your date a glimpse of your humorous side. Keep messages casual. Share something interesting or funny you saw or heard. This isn’t the place for serious issues.
- Don’t overdo it. Like tweets, a little goes a long way when flirtexting. You don’t want your date to feel like he or she’s being stalked. Too many texts makes you look insecure and needy. A short volley of back and forth texts is OK occasionally; but otherwise, limit your contacts to 3 or 4 a day.
- No heavy breathing. Keep the sexual innuendo light and casual. You don’t want to send your date the wrong message by getting hot and heavy too soon. Give the relationship a chance to develop. Tease; don’t pant.